DESPERATE MOTHERS
The Day Before
See these glasses so empty now
Rings of water and midnight sounds are all that’s here
While the drunks sleep fast the night is clear
Tomorrow’s noon takes them far away
Through the wind claps into harm’s way
Down and gone Sirens sing to the sailors on their silent wings
Yes they’re wild in the night till someone sets them free
There’s nothing as I’m sitting here to move me
Just the sounds of those asleep
The sun slowly breaks the horizon bright and new
Mothers, time to blow the horn and fly
So here you are and then here you go
Desperate mothers no one will now
Who hold tight to dreams, those madman schemes
To last you through another day 12/18/82
Suicide Takes Time
Stand still my friend; don’t bother to rub those eyes
Your vision won’t clear, besides there’s nothing to see tonight
How brave you are; how terrible life can be
Just hold my hand, we’ll wait for the morning light
Don’t need a knife, a couple more years will do
Yes it takes some time to get it just right 6/7/83
Open Season and the First Goodbye
Oh, you seemed to be so idle so many years
Cast down, the runaround; breathing softly in the underground
Oh, you planned to make it all when you hit the beach
On top, never stop; never doubting that you keep the beat
And the doors so tightly locked now open call you faraway
To all the children you raised so patiently in your mind
To all my wonder it’s hard to believe that you time is now
That you’re going, and knowing I remain
As the days begin to fade as months pass by
So bright the whitelight; I still feel it from those distant nights
And I wonder what you’re doin, where you’re off to now
Somewhere far from here where your stories and your thoughts are clear
And friend I never thought the world would be so silent without your words
Too many moments were spent deciding nothing al all
But in those words and moments I found a world that was warm and bright
But you’re going and knowing I remain 3/4/83
HARDER
Saved again. From the long lost heart beating so supreme; going out for another meal.
Just in time, to catch a glimpse of your perfect face; looking out across the street.
But hiding those hungry eyes, and running too often, leaves so little time to breathe
For me, it seems; life’s getting harder; I feel, my love, life’s getting harder.
Home today, but the house seems a strange and distant place; from what it was just yesterday.
Holding tight, from the bitter truth on the old TV; life’s not what it used to be.
But out in the sun again, it’s so far away, and we’ve come so very far
To ask, to plead, forced to act smarter; I know, I know, life’s getting harder.
And the end seems to be so close these days. Silently waiting to swallow us all.
So I guess I’ll just sleep tonight with you, and if it ends, I’ll be where it feels warm.
Dead and gone; Just the fragrant smell of the spring remains; and this last glass of wine.
Lost and found; so hard to win, but sure to lose should the final hour arrive.
And yet through this hopeless age of me and myself. I think of the other way out
And hey, I see; life’s getting harder. I know, my love, it’s all gotten harder 10/15/81
Tomorrow
I can see them shadows in the darkness calling for me
In their anger they need me
With my hands tied and my heart held down to keep me silent
Just another day
And I have seen her reaching out to touch me
Hateful and cold; she is asking me for love
For love, child?
And me so helpless as to give her something
But is it love?
I don’t know; I don’t see it; I just wanted someone to talk to
So you feel it and you run into tomorrow searching for some warmth
And a little light to see by
And love child; love will come when your demons free you
From yourself 7/28/83
Truth and Beauty
So it finally comes to pass that you just don’t care
As though you’ve tried to find some heat in the winter air
Hard times have put their mark on you
Freedom to yellow and freedom to blue; freedom to pass it off with an angry smile
So much responsibility for someone so young who’d rather be free
Has hardened your brain and help you survive for a while
And yet you claim to hide inside an innocent child
Who holds on tight to all those fears that drive you wild
No one can say you never dream; that you never try and never scheme
But it’s all in your mind and you can’t make it happen today
Now it’s quiet and the night will call again
And you will turn your empty eyes to the rain within
Yes, tears are the friends you love to make; easy to sorrow and easy to fake
With the truth is you’re just afraid that you really don’t care
You say you’re the one who has to change, but change isn’t easy
It’s just not the same as playing the rock that laughs at the pouring rain 3/2/83
Face to Face
So now it comes to this dead-end street and playing hard is your line
Too many compromised attitudes; too many dying beliefs
You said I’d never be lonely; you said I’d never be blue
It’s just the payment I get when I hand my life to you
Yet who’s to say you’re the one to blame? Who throws the shadows and doubts?
I only know that I trusted you and now I’m living without
It’s not so bad being lonely; it's not so bad being blue
It’s just another example of the hell you put me through
Well friend it’s time to turn the page; it’s time to blot out this lie
I know that life can be difficult but I’m not ready to die
Perhaps we’ll always be lonely; perhaps we’ll always be blue
But I can’t stand going nowhere like I can’t deny I’m you 3/22/83